"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another." ( John 13:34-35)
I have been doing a lot of reading... for me sometimes reading can be good..other times it can not. Too often I think I tend to focus on the opinions of what something means instead of going to the source itself (Hello God, its me Candace). Too often I think I personally can get fixated on one's opinion and it could perhaps become mine...then a week or two later God shows me what He wanted to show me. Sometimes it confirms what I have been thinking, other times, it makes my heart sink and humbles me because I realize that I didnt listen for Him in the first place.
I have been reading a lot of varried opinions on the history of the church.... that yucky history. I mean I know the church has done a lot of amazing things, but come on, lets face it, theres been a lot and still is a lot of yucky stuff that Jesus is probably frowning upon. Im not writing this towards any one person, or any one body of believers. Please no one try to get offended at what I write. I believe there is always good, but when put into one persons opinion (or media or what have you), it can be masked with hate. This is all part of my journey. This is stuff I have decided to learn about due to various thoughts or whatever, and God is taking me through it wonderfully as He always does :)
Jesus' name has been used a LOT in the wrong context.
I read about history where millions were murdered helplessly "in the name of the Lord." How people can judge people "in the name of the Lord." ...the list goes on and on like that.
There have been a lot of things in "Christianity" that Jesus stood firmly AGAINST isnt there?
I think this leaves me a few choices.
1. I say "forget this religious nonsense. I dont need God. The people who follow God cant even get it right, lets take our own journey and leave it at that."
2. Become ignorant to it. Forget those things ever happened, pretend us Christians have always done everything right and never wronged anyone..like..ever. (then I would be lying to myself)
3. Get upclose and personal with Jesus. Get up close and personal with Love. To start walking like Jesus did.
Jesus was preeching love left and right. Im not talking about anyone else but Jesus here. Im not talking about any other Biblical character but Christ. Want to know what Christianity is supposed to look like- its a four letter word. L-O-V-E. Jesus didnt hate on those who were hated on. He didnt like everything, He got frustrated a few times with people, maily the people who were being hipocrites and not doing what they looked like they were doing, but to those others He always moved with compassion. He always moved in love. He is the perfect example.
I can follow religious history, and get angry, frustrated. "oh where or where did we go wrong?" ... or I can follow Jesus' example of Love. I can protest, fight, scream, yell and do all these things that Jesus has been saying not to do, or I can seek Him and follow His example and love. I can fly off the handle (which I used to do, a lot. and sometimes still do. oh boy... one day at a time with Gods grace.) or I can count to three, take a deep breath and as cheesy as it sounds, I can ask myself. What would Jesus do?
He moved with such love that He gave His life! He gave His life for so reasons we all know, but He also gave His life so we would never ever forget that Love and that we could have that love inside us.
I can more than easily continue along a path of frustration of all the things wrong in history, whats to come, society today, and I can act upon those things in a non loving way, or I can use that love I have inside, and begin to use it. Showing love to all people, praying for all people and helping where I can.
This afternoon two wonderful friends of mine showed me Jesus, as they came and helped me rid myself of about twenty (yes twenty) garbage bags full of clothes. We have way to much clothes and laundry is not my friend. And for me, when in six or so months this baby is born and I want to cloth diaper...lets just say I want our laundry under control! It defeats me everytime and I cry to God to save me from my laundry. So He sends love to my home, in the form of two of my sisters in Christ to leave their families for a few hours to help me defeat this enemy. We got a lot accomplished. Much more than me having a panic attack on my basement floor LOL.
I sat just so overwhelmed and humbled and in awe of just how wonderful God is and what His love does.
This is what I plan on focusing on. This love. When I read something even negative about us... I want to respond in love. Not even to get frustrated and say "these people are giving us a bad name." But to pray, ask God for guidance and show those I can, love. Because thats what Christ did. And He is who I want to know and follow and dwell with forever.