I find myself in an intoxicating cycle almost over and over being addicted to the internet .. not so much googling, or blogging even, but mostly social networking. That link just above there is a blog post I did about being addicted mostly to facebook. I went back onto facebook shorty after I made that blogpost for a while and I was able to balance having a social network life, keeping intouch with friends, family, church, my volunteer business and such that way... but very quickly I found myself spending a bit more time on it each day. I found it to get a big crazy and I would do a quick facebook detox, but I have realized that I personally just cant close it off and not be on it. If its activated, its on..Im on, logged in and zoned in. My Bible sits neglected, my housework begins to get neglected and there were days I caught myself neglecting my children....lets face it, playing Journey of Moses is NOT Bible Study..just sayin. :p
God had a vision and a plan for my life. This was not to sit on Facebook all day, while when I went back onto facebook that late spring early summer this year I decided to use it to spread the amazing news of Jesus Christ, I tried as much as I could to share..A majortiy of my status' were Scripture...sharing my faith in the most amazing God, the only God. I wonder how many people had "unsubscribed" from me since only one person besides my family and Church family have even noticed Im gone (or atleast contacted me!) LOL.
Gods vision and plan for me right now I am convinced is to be a Mother and a wife... to take care of the house. To serve my family, to connect with other Mothers and to do that old fashioned "house wife" stuff. I love it. I love being the stay at home Mom...actually being in the work force makes me sick to my stomach.
God has called me to these things, and when I am doing them I think I do an okay job.
But when I get on the computer, this lazyness sets in. "Oh I will soak the dishes then pop on facebook." ... popping on facebook for me is like two hours. Water that was boiling hot is now cold.
We have been doing these Thursday night services at our Church, and it has been the past three weeks about holiness. God started to really nudge me during these services. I would usually come home and cry. We had a ladies night, and it too was about becoming Kingdom focused and the fact that we cannot impart what we dont posess. Im not going to be able to raise children who are set apart for God if Im not set apart for God myself. I have a husband so new in his walk with Christ (Thank You God), I want to be showing Jesus as much as I can to him. I have faith in God, I have seen Him do amazing things in my life when I have put my full trust in only Him...so do I have faith still to reward me from ridding myself of an idol in my life? To show me what He has planned for me when I am not logged on constantly? Our pastor told us flat out a few weeks ago "to dispise a holy lifestyle is to dispise God Himself." God is HOLY. He cannot operate away from that. I need to manage my time much better, I cant waste the steps He's called me to walk in. "God called you to His will, not yours" - was something else that kinda echoed in my head for a long time. Holy Spirit has just been prodding at me "come on, just get rid of the thing..that ONE silly thing that you are so hooked on again and get back at doing what you've been called to do..and for the love of Jesus dont get back on it!"
I deactivated my account and Im telling you I have hardly been on the internet at all since then (except to check email, and that takes like two minutes). How easy was it to do when I know God has my back and was probably like "THANKYOU!"
Ive read more Scripture in the past week and a half than I had in a month. The hunger to devour everything God has to show me is back. I had been starving myself spiritually. I got so much laundry done, I am able to make better time for my kids.
God isreally telling me to get away from all those things in my life that really prevent me from being set apart for Him and just running after Him and getting excited about the fact that He speaks to me through His word, and He wants to hear my prayers constantly and He just takes such joy in what Im doing, even if its scrubbing a toilet. And I take joy in it too because this is what God has given me..this life, these kids, my husband this house... even if I have to clean it all myself day after day, I do it for them and I do it for the Lord. I want to be operating in a way that God can work in me. God never changes, and I have to press forward and get into the lifestyle that He commands His children to walk in. So I must make the change, so I can please Him. And be excited about that above everything else. Having faith that He is going to show me more amazing things still...