Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Making an autumn shift....

I need to learn something so basic.  I need to grasp and fully comprehend something so simple, so childlike that it almost makes me laugh and terrify me at the same time.  As I've mentioned, autumn is a time of struggle for me spiritually.  I need to grasp something sooo sooo basic.  God created the autumn.  God created it for our enjoyment.  Its part of the cycle of how nature runs here and its beauty is something He created and it is for His purposes. 

So simple right?

But I associate it with the years I was pagan, the years I practiced wicca,  the years I followed the devil.   halloween, my little parties out in the woods summoning things that I dont dare even talk about these days.  I associate it with the begining of the school year when I would start to skip school to hang out and drink or get high.  I associate it with dying my hair red to match the leaves colours.  I associate it with things not of Christ and therefore my struggle chugs on each time that beautiful scent of fall hits the wind.  A scent I crave but hate at the same time.  Its my favorite time of the year and my least favorite time all in the same breath.

This is my goal this fall, to totally change my views of the season I crave to love most with Christ. 

Im running for this simple choice, to transform my way of thinking this time of year, so that the next years will be different. 
So if you see a lo
t more oranges, reds and yellows, the discussion of fall and autumny things more and more on here, its because Im working this out.  This has to be done.   This needs to be a season where I can embrace Christ as much as the others.   When I smell the leaves crunching beneath my feet, I need to breathe Christ.  When I hear them, it needs to remind me of His love.  Nothing else.

 James 5:7
Be patient, then, brothers and sisters, until the Lord’s coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop, patiently waiting for the autumn and spring rains.



  2. Just think of how many things can go on your 1000 blessings list :D